A couple of weeks ago, I was having a conversation with a friend about sexual orientation. We talked about how some feel that it is no one’s business when they are approached about this subject.
It got me to thinking. I thought about how much information we put out into the world thanks to our social networks. We share everything from what we ate the night before, to the inappropriate comments about someone we no longer care for.
When I comes to sexual orientation, is it really ‘none of your business’ or is it a fear of not being accepted?
This past week, in Disciple Class we read about Esther. She was a beautiful woman chosen by King Xerxes. She hid her Jewish ethnicity from the king; which she revealed later. Esther, as a queen, has access to the riches of an entire kingdom and can choose to give up her identity for the sake of luxury. Instead she keeps Torah in secret and, ultimately, risks her life in order to save her people.
During the 1700s, Slavery (in America) was at its highest. Throughout this time of oppression, you have lighter skin African Americans trying to pass for Caucasian just to get out of slavery and to a better life. This was simply called ‘passing’. Racial passing refers to a person classified as a member of one racial group attempting to be accepted as a member of a different racial group. The term was used especially in the US to describe a person of mixed-race heritage assimilating to the white majority during times when legal and social conventions of hypo descent classified the person as a minority, subject to racial segregation and discrimination.
When thinking about it twice, what would you say if you were in their shoes and someone asked if you were of African American descent? Would you tell them ‘none of your business’, claim your African American heritage or go with the illusion and allow them to believe that you are Caucasian?
Speaking from my own personal experience with it sexual orientation and being conformable with who I am, I know beyond a shadow of a doubt, my ‘illusion’ was derived from the fear of not being accepted. It was only a few short years ago when I finally loved myself enough to be proud of who I am and the man that God created me to be. My hopes and prayers go out to the people that I love and know who seem to struggle with being comfortable in their own skin. I do know, however, we all have to get there in our own time. Thanks be to God. :-)
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
My Preference…Your Opinion....Our Suggestion
There are people that have their own dating rules tailored to fit their needs, desires and expectations. Then there are the people that judge them. Why is that?
For me, I have an idea on dating some consider ‘out the norm’ for my…how should I say this… ‘Lifestyle’. For one, the person has to have a strong relationship with God. I watch how they treat their mother as well. Lets be honest, if someone treats their mom (and/or father) poorly, why would they treat you any better? Next, they have to be 35 years old or older. This is a personal preference for me because I cannot see myself dating anyone in their 20s. I am not saying that everyone on their 20s is immature (or that everyone 35 and older is mature), it’s merely a preference. Also, I am a HUGE fan of the dark hair and eyes. THAT gets me every time. *Big Smile
With that being said, I find myself in constant conversations my dating rules and preference. I find myself defending this ‘list’ with people until I reach a point of frustration. Then I say to the person “Wait. These are my preferences. Why do you have an issue with it?”
For some, it was their way of letting me know that I was maybe ‘boxing’ myself in. For others, I believe it was a way of saying that maybe they would make a good candidate.
I started thinking about the friends of mine and their ‘box’ reference. Was I putting myself into this metaphoric box; which would prevent ‘the one’ from reaching me? Possibly – so I decided to make some adjustments. I will not budge on the relationship with God requirement. I might think twice (or even three times) about the age minimum. To let the dark hair and eyes requirement go; that might take a bit more persuading *Bigger Smile
For me, I have an idea on dating some consider ‘out the norm’ for my…how should I say this… ‘Lifestyle’. For one, the person has to have a strong relationship with God. I watch how they treat their mother as well. Lets be honest, if someone treats their mom (and/or father) poorly, why would they treat you any better? Next, they have to be 35 years old or older. This is a personal preference for me because I cannot see myself dating anyone in their 20s. I am not saying that everyone on their 20s is immature (or that everyone 35 and older is mature), it’s merely a preference. Also, I am a HUGE fan of the dark hair and eyes. THAT gets me every time. *Big Smile
With that being said, I find myself in constant conversations my dating rules and preference. I find myself defending this ‘list’ with people until I reach a point of frustration. Then I say to the person “Wait. These are my preferences. Why do you have an issue with it?”
For some, it was their way of letting me know that I was maybe ‘boxing’ myself in. For others, I believe it was a way of saying that maybe they would make a good candidate.
I started thinking about the friends of mine and their ‘box’ reference. Was I putting myself into this metaphoric box; which would prevent ‘the one’ from reaching me? Possibly – so I decided to make some adjustments. I will not budge on the relationship with God requirement. I might think twice (or even three times) about the age minimum. To let the dark hair and eyes requirement go; that might take a bit more persuading *Bigger Smile
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