I wake up this morning from a dream. This dream led me to do some ‘research’ on a situation that could be detrimental to my well-being. Upon doing this research, I realized that I might have been caught up in the ‘new’ of things and should always tread with caution.
So here I am, up at 6:31am trying to figure out what to do with my next steps of life. Denver or Dallas?
I refer back to my previous K.I.S.S. blog entry and it does not help. LOL However, I know what to do. I know I cannot figure this out on my own. This is why we have a Heavenly Father to help us along this path in life.
Side Note: Some make fun of my relationship and me with God. That is very ok. We all have our outlets and vises to help us make our decisions in life, I do not judge. Some have drugs, alcohol, friends, foes, spiritual statues, lucky underwear and etc (LOL). Again, I don’t judge. However, I do find it comical that the ones that judge me for my beliefs, have a history of being judged (people of color, homosexuals and etc). Let’s break that chain, people. Just let everyone be who they want to be no matter if you believe in it or not. No one is telling you to ‘go along with it’. Just leave it alone. Don’t make it your personal task in life to try to make the other person feel shame or embarrassed. Because I tell you right now, it will not work on me. God has provided me with Grace, Love, Mercy and blessings far better than what anyone on earth can give me.
Love you all,
Byron Gabriel
Saturday, August 28, 2010
Thursday, August 26, 2010
K.I.S.S…
We all heard of the infamous K.I.S.S.; keep it simple, stupid. I think that we all need to remind ourselves of this when it comes to life and especially relationships.
During a chat with a friend tonight, we discussed relationships. He was stating that relationships are hard and people are hard to figure out. I smiled and remembered the days when I had the same thought and feelings about relationships.
When I first started dating, I went into it with open arms and a feeling of excitement that no one could destroy. After all, it was new and I only knew of the ‘yucky love stuff’ I fashioned in my young, naive mind.
Then after a few relationships and a marriage, true life hit me. Suddenly there was an assault on my hope and a dagger in my heart. OK, OK…I am being dramatic. LOL However, you get the point. Anyone over the age of 30 years old, who takes a quick review of his or her lives starting with the early dating age, knows of what I speak. Something happens during this process and one modifies their way of thinking. It can go either way; positive or negative.
For most of us, we look back and finally get the answer; the answer and guide towards a successful relationship. We start noticing signs from the very beginning. Signs such as these:
How does he/she treat their mother and the friends they claim they love? – If they disrespect their mother (especially when they have a kind and loving mother), how in hell are they going to respect you? If they cant revere the person that gave them life and nurtured them….what makes you think you are on a higher level in their minds?
You ask about their history and previous relationships. That will give you some indication if they have learned their lesson and if their paths have changed.
Depending on who you are, you check for sensitivity. If they are the type that seem to have no concern about their fellow man, why would you date this person?
The list can go on forever…
What about when you want to know if someone is truly interested? This, to me, has been easier ONLY in the last 3 years. I know it took me a while. Well better late than never right? I realize that we are all different. However, there are some parts of us that can be ‘cookie cutter’ when it comes to our attraction and intrigue towards another person.
For instance, we want to know more about that person. Curiosity is in our DNA; when we are intrigued by ANYTHING, we want to know more. That can be food, a person, a possible vacation spot and etc. If they are not asking questions or trying to get to know you, they are probably ‘not that into you’.
Some may argue that point because they confuse chatting (talk or text) frequently as a sign that someone likes them. That could be because you are, at that time, a ‘filler’ and they have no one else to really talk to. Be careful and pay attention to know the difference.
Another way you can tell if someone is interested is by how much time the want to spend with you. Now let us be honest about this one, especially us men. If someone is busy with work or school (or both), that person will make time for you if they are interested. Now I am not saying they will make a lot of time with you if they have valid reasons. For the most part, we can all make a little time. If we do create this window of freedom and we spend it with you, guess what….we like you ;-).
During that chat with my friend, I reminded him that relationships are supposed to be simple. We get so used to the ‘less than perfect’ relationships, we think this is how it is supposed to be. These relationships derive out of loneliness or stem from our low self-esteem. When he mentioned that people are hard to understand I immediately thought ‘why?’ If you do not understand someone, open your mouth as ask. Simplicity, I am huge fan of yours. Will you marry me? LOL
Remember, keep it simple stupid (K.I.S.S)
During a chat with a friend tonight, we discussed relationships. He was stating that relationships are hard and people are hard to figure out. I smiled and remembered the days when I had the same thought and feelings about relationships.
When I first started dating, I went into it with open arms and a feeling of excitement that no one could destroy. After all, it was new and I only knew of the ‘yucky love stuff’ I fashioned in my young, naive mind.
Then after a few relationships and a marriage, true life hit me. Suddenly there was an assault on my hope and a dagger in my heart. OK, OK…I am being dramatic. LOL However, you get the point. Anyone over the age of 30 years old, who takes a quick review of his or her lives starting with the early dating age, knows of what I speak. Something happens during this process and one modifies their way of thinking. It can go either way; positive or negative.
For most of us, we look back and finally get the answer; the answer and guide towards a successful relationship. We start noticing signs from the very beginning. Signs such as these:
How does he/she treat their mother and the friends they claim they love? – If they disrespect their mother (especially when they have a kind and loving mother), how in hell are they going to respect you? If they cant revere the person that gave them life and nurtured them….what makes you think you are on a higher level in their minds?
You ask about their history and previous relationships. That will give you some indication if they have learned their lesson and if their paths have changed.
Depending on who you are, you check for sensitivity. If they are the type that seem to have no concern about their fellow man, why would you date this person?
The list can go on forever…
What about when you want to know if someone is truly interested? This, to me, has been easier ONLY in the last 3 years. I know it took me a while. Well better late than never right? I realize that we are all different. However, there are some parts of us that can be ‘cookie cutter’ when it comes to our attraction and intrigue towards another person.
For instance, we want to know more about that person. Curiosity is in our DNA; when we are intrigued by ANYTHING, we want to know more. That can be food, a person, a possible vacation spot and etc. If they are not asking questions or trying to get to know you, they are probably ‘not that into you’.
Some may argue that point because they confuse chatting (talk or text) frequently as a sign that someone likes them. That could be because you are, at that time, a ‘filler’ and they have no one else to really talk to. Be careful and pay attention to know the difference.
Another way you can tell if someone is interested is by how much time the want to spend with you. Now let us be honest about this one, especially us men. If someone is busy with work or school (or both), that person will make time for you if they are interested. Now I am not saying they will make a lot of time with you if they have valid reasons. For the most part, we can all make a little time. If we do create this window of freedom and we spend it with you, guess what….we like you ;-).
During that chat with my friend, I reminded him that relationships are supposed to be simple. We get so used to the ‘less than perfect’ relationships, we think this is how it is supposed to be. These relationships derive out of loneliness or stem from our low self-esteem. When he mentioned that people are hard to understand I immediately thought ‘why?’ If you do not understand someone, open your mouth as ask. Simplicity, I am huge fan of yours. Will you marry me? LOL
Remember, keep it simple stupid (K.I.S.S)
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Extensions of you…
I heard once before that your friends are extensions of you. The message that I took from that was this:
For the most part, you and your friend(s) may share the same views, political status/opinions, and views of right/wrong. So when you decide to develop new friendships, what would be the blueprint towards a fruitful and prosperous friendship?
This is my opinion (Side note: I am STILL learning because, apparently, I have chosen some shady individuals in the last year). I believe that it is important to know that each person is truly and individual. However, I believe the ‘core’ of each person has to match up in some way or another (even if it is a small percentage). For instance, you have a friend that has multiple friends that they keep close and these people (in some ways) abuse their children. You have a strong dislike (and even contempt) for these types of parents. Your friend not only allow these people to be in their lives, but they even let these negligent parents around their own children.
Another example is this: Your new friend cannot, will not and do not understand human emotion. They make you feel as if you are less than a human being when you tap into these feelings; it is because they are afraid of what they do not understand. You, on the other hand, have been in touch with your emotions and feel they make you human. Emotional detachment (emotional retardation) is foreign to you. Instead of saying they do not understand, they call you a**holes and ignore your feelings altogether.
At the end of the day, we should look at these friends and remember they represent you because they are ‘extensions of you’. Do you want to continue and make excuses for them? Or should you cut your loses, and move on?
As in most relationships (friendship or lover), love is usually not the problem. Its all the other ‘stuff’ that comes with it.
What ever happened to the Melanie Green's, Tracy Barnes' and Larry Lee's of the world?? The friends that have your back no matter what and will truly be there to comfort and listen to you?
For the most part, you and your friend(s) may share the same views, political status/opinions, and views of right/wrong. So when you decide to develop new friendships, what would be the blueprint towards a fruitful and prosperous friendship?
This is my opinion (Side note: I am STILL learning because, apparently, I have chosen some shady individuals in the last year). I believe that it is important to know that each person is truly and individual. However, I believe the ‘core’ of each person has to match up in some way or another (even if it is a small percentage). For instance, you have a friend that has multiple friends that they keep close and these people (in some ways) abuse their children. You have a strong dislike (and even contempt) for these types of parents. Your friend not only allow these people to be in their lives, but they even let these negligent parents around their own children.
Another example is this: Your new friend cannot, will not and do not understand human emotion. They make you feel as if you are less than a human being when you tap into these feelings; it is because they are afraid of what they do not understand. You, on the other hand, have been in touch with your emotions and feel they make you human. Emotional detachment (emotional retardation) is foreign to you. Instead of saying they do not understand, they call you a**holes and ignore your feelings altogether.
At the end of the day, we should look at these friends and remember they represent you because they are ‘extensions of you’. Do you want to continue and make excuses for them? Or should you cut your loses, and move on?
As in most relationships (friendship or lover), love is usually not the problem. Its all the other ‘stuff’ that comes with it.
What ever happened to the Melanie Green's, Tracy Barnes' and Larry Lee's of the world?? The friends that have your back no matter what and will truly be there to comfort and listen to you?
Friday, August 13, 2010
The Changed Human??
Often times, we hear about people that ‘suddenly’ go berserk and do things that seem to be out of character. Today I was having a short discussion about the actor Mel Gibson. Over the years, this actor grabbed prestigious awards such as ‘Best Director’ (Braveheart, 1995); which he won an Oscar and Golden Globe. However, Mr. Gibson has also been known for his racist slurs, drunken arrests and alleged abuse towards his baby momma.
As I sit and listen to this television, I hear other actors like Whoopie Goldberg***, Tracy Morgan and other Black actors state they do not believe Mel Gibson is a racist. They seem to dismiss the fact Mr Gibson has been recorded making racist slurs against the Jewish and the African American community. Reps for Mr. Gibson say in so many words….’Blame it on the alcohol.’ The supported actors for Mr. Gibson go on to say this is NOT the person they know and have worked with over the years. They say that something has ‘changed’ and none of us knows the entire story. You know what, they are correct. We do not know the entire story. However, from what I heard and what has been recorded and played 1,000 times on radio and television, I don’t need to know much more than that.
In all honesty, we have all said and done things we regret and WISH we could take back. However, how many times can we make the SAME mistakes and expect our friends, families and fans to believe this was a simple ‘whoopsy daisy’??
Is this the REAL Mel Gibson that has been hidden by PR and Hollywood? Or is this just a mistake.
Well this is my opinion: I believe that people don’t change, only behaviors. Don’t get me wrong, I feel this pertains to us ALL (myself included). We can hide and learn to bite our tongue when it comes to these statements or feelings. Which means our actions/behaviors will change. Deep down, we still feel the same way.
***Side Note About Whoopie Goldberg - Did you know that Ms Goldberg refuses to have a black husband in her movies? She played the wife of civil activist Medgar Evers who was black. However, during the movie, he was dead. This is just something to think about.
Enjoy! :-)
As I sit and listen to this television, I hear other actors like Whoopie Goldberg***, Tracy Morgan and other Black actors state they do not believe Mel Gibson is a racist. They seem to dismiss the fact Mr Gibson has been recorded making racist slurs against the Jewish and the African American community. Reps for Mr. Gibson say in so many words….’Blame it on the alcohol.’ The supported actors for Mr. Gibson go on to say this is NOT the person they know and have worked with over the years. They say that something has ‘changed’ and none of us knows the entire story. You know what, they are correct. We do not know the entire story. However, from what I heard and what has been recorded and played 1,000 times on radio and television, I don’t need to know much more than that.
In all honesty, we have all said and done things we regret and WISH we could take back. However, how many times can we make the SAME mistakes and expect our friends, families and fans to believe this was a simple ‘whoopsy daisy’??
Is this the REAL Mel Gibson that has been hidden by PR and Hollywood? Or is this just a mistake.
Well this is my opinion: I believe that people don’t change, only behaviors. Don’t get me wrong, I feel this pertains to us ALL (myself included). We can hide and learn to bite our tongue when it comes to these statements or feelings. Which means our actions/behaviors will change. Deep down, we still feel the same way.
***Side Note About Whoopie Goldberg - Did you know that Ms Goldberg refuses to have a black husband in her movies? She played the wife of civil activist Medgar Evers who was black. However, during the movie, he was dead. This is just something to think about.
Enjoy! :-)
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